[20 Dec 2009|12:47am] elska Dear Aly, I cut you off. I'm sorry, but it's how I handle pain. You've always said no one ever taught you how to process anger. Well, I'm the same way with sadness. I love you so much. Those words can't even tell how much. I wasn't a great girlfriend, especially around the end. I was so distant. I could just feel you slipping away from me, and so I thought if I pulled away some it'd hurt less. It didn't. I've spent the last year trying to love someone else. Anyone else, it seems. I found love a couple times, but it's all superficial compared to what I feel for you. You may never come back to me. You may never care for me that way again, even though I know how much you care for me and my family. I have to let you figure things out for yourself. That means pulling away. You said you're not happy, and when I said that's all I want you to be I meant it. If I stick around and try to be your friend I'm afraid I'll just pull you down into my heartbreak. You are so beautiful, and funny, and intelligent,... I hope whoever you're with appreciates you for all that you are, because I don't think there's anyone else in the world like you. Please don't forget how much I love you, because I am always here for you if you need me. Always. xox.

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